Affirmations Voiceover

FEMALES ONLY NATIVE ENGLISH SPEAKERS. I would like some professional voice over actress with a soothing voice to record the following:

I am riding the rainbow and banging 2 new hot girls on my bed every single day!!

I am gloriously smashing disrespectful guys off

I am feeling exhilaration and verbally slashing people's arguments off

I am proudly showing my friends and potential friends how to efficiently do the art of pickup

I am feeling a sheer excitment as I am receving over 300000k euros a day

I am feeling super gratefulness and respcted as I am helping my people better their lives

I am feeling very proud as I am showing my people how to conduct their lives