F- 15 EAGLE News Distribution Software

I would like this F- 15 EAGLE News Distribution Software to be able to reach all media outlets, (including CNN, CNBC, USA TODAY, AP, BLOOMBERG, GOOGLE NEWS, YAHOO NEWS, MSN NEWS, also including ever major media outlet all over the world. Also every websites, news agencies, all social media, all free advertising sites, and more. I would like it to be able to post news on every online newspaper and magazine site, blog, ect. It must also be able to post banners all over the internet. I want it to Target media in the U.S., Canada, Europe and around the entire world. I would like this to measure performance with Newswire Analytics. I want this to distribute news to over 195 countries in over 35 local languages. It must also be able to include pictures, 5 links and up to 2000 characters ad.