I want you to read my business writing and suggest, change, or give me a better idea to add on it

I'm trying to contact a certain company to persuade them to make a partnership with my company. I expect you to not only read my writing based on my purpose but suggest how it can be more persuasive. I want you to research on this topic to make my email more dynamic. Your suggestion shouldn't be limited to correcting some sentence structures. We will discuss more details on chat.

I already used grammarly to correct the grammar here and there so you don't have to worry about it.