Need Humorous Haiku for Greeting Cards
Budget: $250 – $750 USD
The pay rate is $5 per haiku that I use. I am looking for 10 to 20 haiku to be used in greeting cards.
I am producing greeting cards called Brutally True Haiku. Each card will have a humorous haiku that addresses one of those brutal truths that we need to know but don't want to hear. A couple of amateur examples:
You are bad at sex
Porn is not education
Ask me what I like
He does not text you
Because he does not want to
Don't complicate truth
I am looking for haiku that are humorous in their simple truth. (They are actually only funny if you are not the receipient). They should not be malicious and they should not be so softened that the brutal truth is obscured. They should not have flowery poetic language.
Some possible subjects are always being late, bad breath, always talking about yourself, being a bad listener, looking at your phone and ignoring people, breaking up with a romantic partner, breaking up with a friend, talking down to people, etc. I will have a more comprehensive list of subjects after I hire someone.
I am producing greeting cards called Brutally True Haiku. Each card will have a humorous haiku that addresses one of those brutal truths that we need to know but don't want to hear. A couple of amateur examples:
You are bad at sex
Porn is not education
Ask me what I like
He does not text you
Because he does not want to
Don't complicate truth
I am looking for haiku that are humorous in their simple truth. (They are actually only funny if you are not the receipient). They should not be malicious and they should not be so softened that the brutal truth is obscured. They should not have flowery poetic language.
Some possible subjects are always being late, bad breath, always talking about yourself, being a bad listener, looking at your phone and ignoring people, breaking up with a romantic partner, breaking up with a friend, talking down to people, etc. I will have a more comprehensive list of subjects after I hire someone.