Time Thing

Hay (there are horses in this Thing), I am a prolific short story writer, very short stories, called Songs. They're stringing themselves together in a Story. Unfortunately, I have no dialogue/narrative experience. I dove in (or the Story pushed me) anyway, and wrote an opening 3k words, with accompanying 30 min mp3 narrative of same, with a few songs woven in....sort of a musical, but more "organic/melded" (hopefully). Novel concept (yes, I need help with narrative/dialogue, and perhaps humor, ha!). I first sought out Editors to review my opening, but they want finished pieces. Why would anyone with no story-writing experience get 50k words done only to find it "sucketh"? You need not answer that. Just tell me if you would do a sort of Beta read, let me know if I my novel concept is sound (for it is a novel with music/sound....remember, humor?), and if I might be able to pull it off, or on, or in any viable direction.
ps- Besides horses, there be Vikings in this Thing, dreams with songs from Before, songs with dreams of To Come, Thomas the Worldly Priest (from Before), a Amorphous Wobbly Wave of a male protagonist (from Now) with a Sharp Straight LIne of a female protagonist, also from Now. But they both enter Before and To Come, thru Dreams and Song, to meet a mysterious lost Viking, and a wise and mystical Great Great Granddaughter from a Time closer to Home. That's a long ps, with some amorphous (tho hopefully intriguing) rambling. Perhaps you might help me with all that.