I need corrections and edits done on my paper
Budget: $10 – $30 USD
Corrections that need to be applied to the paper
PARAGRAPH INDENTING: The first sentence in the paragraphs needs to be indented a half inch.
SYNTAX: The following thesis has a weak English syntax:
[The rulings of children and visitation rights have been disputed over for centuries at a time our criminal justice system has knowingly put children at risk and because of these various challenges arise such as legal rights, financial responsibility, emotional /mental abuse, and limited help our legal system continues to fail families. ]
HYPOTHESIS: The proposed hypothesis is weak. Ideally, it should be re-written to make it stronger – and then place it as the first sentence for your readers to see (you can discuss it after that). Your hypothesis should be something that you can test. It’s called a testable hypothesis. In other words, you need to be able to measure "what will happen next."
MEASUREMENTS & ANALYSIS: There is a section titled “measurement and analysis,” but it needs to be more robust to show “how” will you measure or analyze the information (data) that you find. Exactly what kind of data will be collected – and most importantly, exactly how will it be analyzed or measured? Will statistics be “compared and contrasted”? Will statistics prove or disprove something? Will it be discussed qualitatively or quantitatively? Please be more robust and specific in the explanation. Please write more.
ANNOTATED BIBLIOGRAPHY: In the annotated bibliography, the first part needs to be formatted in APA style, either as a book or a journal or a website, etc. Also, in the descriptive portion of the applicable resources, the entire narrative needs to be indented ½ inches
ETHICAL STANDARDS: The section that is listed as “Ethical Standards” discusses the wrong issues. Ethical standards have nothing to do with properly citing articles. It should address how the researcher (you) are going to ensure that your research is not a danger to anyone or to the public. For example, do you need approval from an Institutional Review Board (IRB) before you conduct your research? Please discuss that in your paper.
REFERENCE PAGE: The references must be on a page unto themselves, per APA guidelines. Your references aren’t on a page unto themselves in this paper
Based on the feedback you have received on your introduction paragraph, begin writing a 3 page rough draft of the body paragraphs of your research paper, which should have a clear focus, problems and solutions, and reliable/scholarly sources as support. You should have a good supply of research notes to bring into each of your arguments. Be sure your rough draft includes the following:
• An introduction that has been revised based on prior feedback
• Body paragraphs organized around focused analysis and supporting evidence for each of the key points that you are researching
• In-text citations and a reference page to document the sources being used
PARAGRAPH INDENTING: The first sentence in the paragraphs needs to be indented a half inch.
SYNTAX: The following thesis has a weak English syntax:
[The rulings of children and visitation rights have been disputed over for centuries at a time our criminal justice system has knowingly put children at risk and because of these various challenges arise such as legal rights, financial responsibility, emotional /mental abuse, and limited help our legal system continues to fail families. ]
HYPOTHESIS: The proposed hypothesis is weak. Ideally, it should be re-written to make it stronger – and then place it as the first sentence for your readers to see (you can discuss it after that). Your hypothesis should be something that you can test. It’s called a testable hypothesis. In other words, you need to be able to measure "what will happen next."
MEASUREMENTS & ANALYSIS: There is a section titled “measurement and analysis,” but it needs to be more robust to show “how” will you measure or analyze the information (data) that you find. Exactly what kind of data will be collected – and most importantly, exactly how will it be analyzed or measured? Will statistics be “compared and contrasted”? Will statistics prove or disprove something? Will it be discussed qualitatively or quantitatively? Please be more robust and specific in the explanation. Please write more.
ANNOTATED BIBLIOGRAPHY: In the annotated bibliography, the first part needs to be formatted in APA style, either as a book or a journal or a website, etc. Also, in the descriptive portion of the applicable resources, the entire narrative needs to be indented ½ inches
ETHICAL STANDARDS: The section that is listed as “Ethical Standards” discusses the wrong issues. Ethical standards have nothing to do with properly citing articles. It should address how the researcher (you) are going to ensure that your research is not a danger to anyone or to the public. For example, do you need approval from an Institutional Review Board (IRB) before you conduct your research? Please discuss that in your paper.
REFERENCE PAGE: The references must be on a page unto themselves, per APA guidelines. Your references aren’t on a page unto themselves in this paper
Based on the feedback you have received on your introduction paragraph, begin writing a 3 page rough draft of the body paragraphs of your research paper, which should have a clear focus, problems and solutions, and reliable/scholarly sources as support. You should have a good supply of research notes to bring into each of your arguments. Be sure your rough draft includes the following:
• An introduction that has been revised based on prior feedback
• Body paragraphs organized around focused analysis and supporting evidence for each of the key points that you are researching
• In-text citations and a reference page to document the sources being used