Edit a story.. 4800 words about
Budget: £10 – £20 GBP
Fictional story needs someone to check and correct making it interesting read.
4850 about is the word count . Could you tell me how much it would be?
Thanks
Could you pick a paragraph and show me how would you change it? I just need to have an idea what talent you have thank you. Here is just a few paragraphs so you have an idea what it’s about.
If you can correct a paragraph so I can see your style might help me to decide if you are the right performer it. Thank you
Time Lapse
Beyond many seas, between the very wall of this planet and outer galaxies. There existed a time lapse, which was believed to be created by repetitive weather changes.
For over many many years, weather changes kept occurring. At some point all was flooded at first, then ice age came and many other weather changes took place throughout.
And as throughout all the centuries, as these weather changes had been happening, a time lapse, was created, between the wall of this planet and the outer universe. No one unfortunately found out about it. Perhaps, because no one would even believe such a thing.
1
One day, it was on a sunny day, a very young man, decided, he was going to travel the world, on his ship, all on his own. He was convinced, he could do it. Because he was young and strong and brave and thought of himself to be fearless. Believed in himself to be passionate and an achiever. He knew, it would be difficult and actually very hard. He knew it would be more than a challenge. He knew it would be a life-experience and a battle-for-life-to survive. He knew, he had his limits.
He had his family, home he loved. But he desperately wanted to try out his intelligence and his own bravery.
And so he set off, on a sunny morning, with his ship, full of supplies and survival kit.
It was hard for everyone from around, who knew him, to accept his decision. With knowing, that he might never come back. But this young man was determined to do as he had decided.
And as he was waving 'good buy' to his own family, he felt heavy in his heart, he knew, he didn't know, for how long, he'd be gone.
4850 about is the word count . Could you tell me how much it would be?
Thanks
Could you pick a paragraph and show me how would you change it? I just need to have an idea what talent you have thank you. Here is just a few paragraphs so you have an idea what it’s about.
If you can correct a paragraph so I can see your style might help me to decide if you are the right performer it. Thank you
Time Lapse
Beyond many seas, between the very wall of this planet and outer galaxies. There existed a time lapse, which was believed to be created by repetitive weather changes.
For over many many years, weather changes kept occurring. At some point all was flooded at first, then ice age came and many other weather changes took place throughout.
And as throughout all the centuries, as these weather changes had been happening, a time lapse, was created, between the wall of this planet and the outer universe. No one unfortunately found out about it. Perhaps, because no one would even believe such a thing.
1
One day, it was on a sunny day, a very young man, decided, he was going to travel the world, on his ship, all on his own. He was convinced, he could do it. Because he was young and strong and brave and thought of himself to be fearless. Believed in himself to be passionate and an achiever. He knew, it would be difficult and actually very hard. He knew it would be more than a challenge. He knew it would be a life-experience and a battle-for-life-to survive. He knew, he had his limits.
He had his family, home he loved. But he desperately wanted to try out his intelligence and his own bravery.
And so he set off, on a sunny morning, with his ship, full of supplies and survival kit.
It was hard for everyone from around, who knew him, to accept his decision. With knowing, that he might never come back. But this young man was determined to do as he had decided.
And as he was waving 'good buy' to his own family, he felt heavy in his heart, he knew, he didn't know, for how long, he'd be gone.
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