revision assignment

Job ID: 39843664

Budget: $10 – $30 USD

ENG 110 Revision activity #1

Revision practice

Below is a student’s introduction for an essay on changing a habit. Please revise this by using the strategies listed below the paragraph. Write as though the reader has no knowledge of the assignment.


I am going to try not to bite my nails this semester. Breaking a habit. I am going to try many methods to accomplish this. Some nail polishes taste bitter.


Use the four strategies below to revise.


Begin the introduction broadly and move to specific/ revise topic sentence

Use transitions to connect the sentences better

Expand or make leaner sentences

Correct sentence fragment

Revision:












Revision for Wordiness and Redundancy

Time to practice punctuation and lean writing. In the paragraph below, eliminate redundancy and repetition. Rewrite the paragraph using punctuation from my presentation. The paragraph should be no more than FOUR sentences. You may use less than four, but it cannot be longer than four sentences.

John is an excellent cook. For each recipe, he selects compatible and exotic ingredients. He looks for foods that would pair nicely together but might be hard to find in your local grocery. He orders his ingredients from far-off lands or different countries. He practices his recipes several times before sharing them with anyone. Sometimes he makes a recipe six times before allowing anyone to try it. His dinner guests never leave disappointed. He perfects his recipe long before they arrive. He is truly born to create masterpieces people eat. He is King of the Kitchen.


Answer: